Talents under the pressure of standardization: how do our children become employees?

Every mother of a child under the age of 3 years would say, that her child is unique. Indeed, this is the age, when not only a loving mother, but also any adult can note the pure expression of child’s individuality.

Виктория Лямец, психолог, владелица Future Education Center 3/7 в Киеве.

Victoria Liamets, psychologist, owner of Future Education Center 3/7 in Kiev.

A child is straightforward, sincere in expression and completely unable to hide inner impulses. It is fair to say that this is the age, when children simply “glow” with their unique inner light. It’s almost impossible to stop endless hugs and kisses. Children are diamonds that has not yet been cut by the hands of a skilled or young jeweler named Life. As parents, we always get astonished at the changes that take place next. For some strange reason, children start to loose their individuality and behave like everybody else! They become a part of a group, class, team or society.

Why do children start to loose their individuality?

Inner individuality ceases to determine the behavior of children. It’s necessary to satisfy the requirements of the surrounding world where children live. The generally accepted concepts of success, goodness and accuracy become more important, than being true to yourself. The denial of such orders for some children is nothing, but resistance, though, in fact, it is another way to betray themselves by means of a riot.

School is a place where an inexperienced talent looses firm ground completely. It is a final step on the way to adjustment. A huge mechanism of grades, orders and rules of behavior further adjustment, depriving children not only of their individuality, self-expression and creativity, but also of  understanding their natural desires.

WITHIN 12 YEARS ON THE WAY TO ADJUSTMENT, CHILDREN LOSE THEIR ABILITY TO THINK, TAKE RESPONSIBILITIES FOR THEIR DECISIONS, COPE WITH STRESS AND, ABOVE ALL, THEY STOP TO FIND SUPPORT WITHIN THEMSELVES. THEY LOOSE THEIR INDIVIDUALITY.

The reason is that children do not understand what they want and how they fulfill themselves in the future. They do not know their strong points and try to find themselves in those areas, where (attention!) they were praised or encouraged. The second behaviour pattern is to follow the path of least resistance, getting surrounded with tablets, smartphones and a parents’ credit cards.

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Very few people stand out for their success, because they worked harder than others and discovered their field of force. By the way, this is not necessarily the field which makes them happy. The world is full of smart, successful, but unfortunate people who don’t like their own occupation. Another common pattern of successful type is rebels who are tend to resist the pressure of the outside world. Sometimes, with the help of intuition, they find their path through difficulties of mediocrity to the stars in business world. However, such rebels often fail or go astray on their way to the stars and remain simple rebels. It depends on luck. And here we are – the army of parents. Clink our tongues and dab our fingers, watching the next episode of the series ‘The destiny of children’. And here we can see young parents with sinking hearts. There is the main character on the screen – their own child.

We wonder how children patiently lead such a mediocre life, carry out instructions of not that decent people during their whole life or make unsuccessful attempts to prove that they really worth something. ‘Children’ of 30 or 40 years old keep on coming to a dead-lock of their competence, skillfully created during school years by some ‘highly respected’ teachers.

мама с ребенком

What happens to that very individuality?

There is a source of inner ‘light’ in every child. It is the individual potential with is given to children when they are being born and it allows them to take over the world. And then everything depends on the game of chance. Most of the children, accompanied by their parents’ best intentions, go down the road of adjustment, leaving behind the fact, that this road was built to get rid of an urgent problem. The government wanted to overcome illiteracy and homelessness. They also tried to save parents from the problem of education and give teachers possibility to earn their living.

A child who lives in favourable conditions becomes a successful person. With the help of beneficial and proper set of circumstances, intuitive support of parents and considered work, children are able to develop their individual characteristics. In this case, the more individual approach is, the better (try to explain it to the principal of a school with a thousand pupils). The reason is that there is no one and only way for everybody, as there is no hairstyle that looks good for every person. One child has a talent of visual thinking, the second sees abstract pictures and looks at this world with sarcasm and the third is good at getting to the root of the matter. Children with logical way of thinking should be given an opportunity to study in a relaxed atmosphere, in order to think ahead and get prepared for difficulties. Critics should go into details and catch on any issue. Strategists should build teams and manage projects, and creative people should have proper conditions to think out unbelievable ideas and draw their fantastic future. All these talents require a special ‘key’. Children don’t need any information to develop their talents, they needs an inner algorithm of how they should use this information for themselves. Can you see the difference? And only then, if the correct ‘key’ to thinking and behavior type has been found, it is possible to add mathematics, chemistry and English. After all, the knowledge of the subject alone never solves the problem of life determination. It solves the problem of the ability to rely on something within and accomplish goals.

This is our offer to the world. We help to develop the most important traits of children. We don’t teach mathematics (which is also needed), but help to find children’s own way in life, relying on their inner strengths. We help to feel that inner “light” that parents admired about their three-year-old children. Only when this inner “light” starts to break through, we may start takling about such things as ‘mission’ or ‘super-task’. People, who know who they are, can realize their ‘unique selling proposition’ to this world. Our parental task is to understand the personality of our children and help to develop it.

Photo: shutterstock

Source: 4mama.ua

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