How do children become stern adults?

The author is Victoria Liamets, certified coach of FEC 3/7.

The real work begins with the reestablishment of children’s contact with thremselves. It’s the only way they can be not only successful, but also happy.

The traditions of many nations say that some changes happen approximately at the age of 5-7 years, when children begin to lose ‘emittance’, getting stuck in a long-term image. While growing up and getting mature, their image gets older and children become adults: completely stern adults, who are obsessed with themselves. I found out this theory 20 years ago and from this moment life has repeatedly proved it.

We have recently opened the Center 3/7 for children. Important events always leave mixed feelings. Adults haven’t urprised us. Someone was delighted, someone was indifferent and someone was dissatisfied, as a force of habit. This is the game of an adult mind. Children expressed their emotions and acted true to their feelings. Here is an amazing tendency we have observed. The majority of our guests at the event were children. There were about thirty of them. We had two separated halls for them: one for preschoolers and another was for more adult schoolchildren, so that little ones don’t bother them. And that’s what happened. Piligrimage took place in the hall for little children. Adults kept on peeping into the hall, because it was full of joy, vivid emotions (even if it was discontent) and lively action. Every child was active and the atmosphere was quite cheerful, children were not embarassed by the fact that they weren’t acquainted. They belonged to themselves.

In the second hall, on the contrary, was the atmosphere of a complete misunderstanding. Children under the age of 10, dreaming of bringing back the vibrancy of perception and ease of life, still tried to express themselves in their own way. Something worked out for them, although self-conceit had already started a spoke of severity into the wheels of their happiness. And we could observe a completely different picture about the children under the age of 13. What? What are you talking about? Self-expression? The joy of life? Nothing is important, but a smartphone. All incoming suggestions and recommendations were immediately rejected. The only thing they could name was their Instagram profile.

From the experience, we know that work with such children is much more difficult than with little ones. Much more time is required to get through to them. Only then you can eliminate an unnecessary quality that hinders them or help to develop a useful skill. In comparison with them, the work with little children is completely differen. They easily get involved into a process, they don’t need to be motivated with complex arguments.

We can’t change this world in one day or even in one year. Therefore, it is necessary to base our work on the objective adolescent period. It really exists. Children objectively become reserved not only when it comes to their parents, but also in respect of themselves. Thousands of books teach how to take into account the change in endocrine profile, becoming a part of a society and motivation for success. And we state that the real work begins with the reestablishment of children’s contact within thremselves. It’s the only way they can be not only successful, but also happy.

Original Source – ‘Correspondent’

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